October 24, 2006 at 9:27 pm · Filed under money
AdSense is the answer! It’s all right there in the template settings! I’m not just another internet attention whore! I’m a professional blogger!
My witty banter and insights will drive millions to flock to my site.
People will hang on my every word. I’m the next Oprah!
All the while, the great google is figuring out exactly how to trick all the minions into clicking onto stuff that will make me millions!
(rubbing hands together in the best Mr. Burns voice I can muster…)
“Excellent”.
October 24, 2006 at 9:12 pm · Filed under situation, death
Okay, so here is the situation:
- almost 39 years since birth.
- 175lbs - 34 inch waist. and the last 30lbs is all since I turned 30.
- Various gray hairs.
- moments of sheer terror/insight that this thing I’m walking around inside is GOING TO FAIL.
So, what’s a 21st century man supposed to do?
OPTIONS:
- Ignore it. Ain’t nothing to do about it anyways. Pass me another stiff drink.
- Join a religion. Endorse the idea of an eternal existence, despite all intelligent evidence that it’s bunk.
- Join a gym. Start buying “health” products that guarantee a longer life! Join organize sports. Stand on scales and look at muscles in mirror. Buy a Bo-Flex!
- Write the book, the one in your head that is DESTINED to be required reading for 22nd century college students!
- Engage in as much sex as civil society will allow. Find approval in the eyes of young impressionable women. Trick trophy bride to marry you, before she figures out your really a loser in an Armani Suit.
- Buy convertible, vacation home, RV and/or small plane. Ignore it because you don’t have enough time to use it anyways.
- Make and spend as much money as you can get away with. Try to make the money first, but exploit credit if necessary.
- Start a internet blog. Seek public attention and adoration. Everybody gets their 15GB of fame!
- Repeat the list often, until something makes you stop.
October 24, 2006 at 8:50 pm · Filed under Uncategorized
[feedback sound…]
Is this thing on?
[thud thud thud].
Testing. Testing. Testing.
Anybody out there?
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